A Note on Simplicity.
One thing I’ve definitely come to value more and more since
I’ve been in India is the value of simplicity.
America is known worldwide for its consumer based culture and the
excessive amount of ‘stuff’ we accumulate.
Sometimes we buy stuff to make ourselves feel better, sometimes it’s
just too good of a deal to pass up, and sometimes we feel the need to replace
perfectly fine and workable things with shiner and prettier things. Mostly due to the overall low economic status
of India, the accumulation of ‘things’ is not as highly valued. You won’t find cabinets filled with
collections of china dolls or beany babies.
It’s rare to find anything that comes close to resembling a junk drawer
filled with those items you use on average once every five months. The overall décor can be described as basement
furniture your parents kept from the early seventies with an Asian twist. Technology isn’t sleek and new and overall functionality
and practicality play a greater role than the desire to impress through the
things you own. In India and other parts
of the world not yet hit by this excessive facet of western culture you find a
lot of space where you’re used to finding stuff, both mentally and
physically. It’s a refreshing feeling to
open my closet and instead of being overwhelmed by ten thousand wardrobe
choices to find the functionality of 5 outfits.
In America I always felt my head was spinning from the constant division
of time between school, friends, family, work, internships, volunteering, free
time and finding ways to make each division of time as productive as possible. Time management isn’t much different here but
the elimination of unnecessary clutter has had a big impact on my overall
ability to focus and to help clear my mind of unnecessary clutter as well. The elimination of television and the
Internet has definitely played a large role as well although it does have me at
a slight disadvantage with regards to current events and relative media
topics. Basically, when I return to the
states I don’t see myself living off of 2 t shirts, dirty sandals and forcibly
cutting myself off from all media ties.
I do see myself, however, making strong considerations about the necessary
and unnecessary things in my life that play a part in passive distractions from
areas that deserve greater levels of attention.
A Note on Independence.
This one…I’m still struggling with. Personal independence, something so highly
regarded in an American mindset, is something that’s not strongly valued in
India. In America it’s the expected norm
to leave home as soon as you’re old enough or finances permit but in India, you’ll
find grown, financially stable adults living with their parents even after
their married. Parents are so involved
in their children’s lives that they hold a very strong say in who their children
marry and there have been many cases where love marriages hold a back seat to
arranged marriages in the interest in pleasing the parents. The strong, deep
rooted family ties which are common throughout India put family and community
at a greater value than the individualistic mindset. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing… but coming
from a person who thought herself ready to move out on her own at 8 years old combined
with an irrational yet deep rooted dislike for all authoritative figures makes
it hard as a 21 year old to have a 10:30 curfew along with constant reports of
where I’m going, with who, and when. Of
course it’s not only Indian culture that requires parents to be a bit more
controlling and protective of what you do when, I’m also a foreigner. Traveling through any foreign country
requires a heightened level of awareness with respect to understanding the
norms and keeping yourself safe in a new environment. But I’m the worst kind of foreigner you can be
if you’re seeking independence, a female foreigner. Given the high incidences of rape and sexual
violence towards women in India you may say, ‘Well duh, independence is a small
price to pay for your safety in a foreign country like India.’
My response would be that although it is a legitimate
issue, over half of all cases of rape and sexual abuse happen within the family
home, America has a higher per capita rate of rape, and it’s common knowledge
to travel in well lit, well-populated places at night in large groups. I have also never felt uneasy or unsafe at
any point during my time in Pune and found living back home in North
Philadelphia a more viable threat to safety.
I really don’t have much of an issue having a 10:30 curfew at night,
most places close by that time anyway.
It’s more so the issue of being an adult who’s been living on my own for
the past couple of years to be reinstated with rules, curfews, and someone to
answer to. It is humbling, though, sometimes
to be put back into my place. Even as a
child I considered any rule to be open for discussion (note: my parents were fairly
strict growing up even by Indian standards so this was more of a nature borne
trait rather than nurture) but parenting techniques are a bit different here
where rules leave no room for conversation.
If curfew is 10:30 and I ask for an extension till 11 pm, I’ll more
likely be met with laughter than with any kind of further discourse.
